Twas the night before doomsday

And all through the house,

Everyone felt shitty

Even the mouse.

Mom at her whorehouse, dad smoking grass,

I justsettled down for a nice peice of ass.

When out on the lawn i saw a big dick,

I knew at a moment it must be st. Prick.

He came down the chimney

Like a bat out of hell,

I knew at the moment the fucker had fell.

He filled up the stockings with pretzels and beer,

And a big rubber dick

For my brother the queer.

He rose up the chimney with a thunderous fart,

The son of a bitch

Blew the chimney apart.

He swore and he cursed as he rode out of sight,

Fuck you all and have a hell of a night.